August 18, 2010

Knowhere

I stand on the edge of the world, my feet ready to walk. I feel only a light breeze and the weight of the bag I carry, filled with selected belongings to ease my journey. I know what lies behind me, but not what’s ahead. If I did, it would not be the same.

I take a moment to breathe and fill myself of this instant of stillness. I am on the threshold. I have no plan to review, no last-minute thing on my mind. I am liberated of having to know what the fuck I’m doing.

On my path will be strangers of all kinds, to whom I’ll be completely unknown. Fresh. New, in a way. To them, I won’t have a personality to uphold or a standard to live up to. I’ll be some guy they might have noticed in the crowd or who walked into their store. Maybe I’ll have asked them for directions, fumbling a couple words in their language with a large smile and open eyes. Perhaps they will have come to me, curious about who I am or the reason for my presence.

What will follow will be completely up to us. Either they will take some of their busy time to show me something they find special about the surroundings, or I’ll find a way to make them laugh or think of a story to tell with a mix of pantomime and words. Maybe we’ll just go on with our respective businesses without establishing any specific contact.

Or maybe, just maybe, in a blink of a moment, a gate will open. Out of the random contact, a spark of mutual understanding will fly about for the shortest of times. An eye-to-eye look, a furtive nod, a smile, a sincere handshake, a slight bow. An extra fruit in my order. A piece of candy handed to their wide-eyed, staring child. A fragment of humanity.

But as of now, none of that has happened.

I am simply standing, my hands in my pockets, in front of the unknown. What great marvels and terrible plights will unravel before me, no one knows. Wonders, horrors and everything in between are the cobblestones on a path I make, not one I follow.

At the end of this thought, while the world spins and turns, I take a first step out of time and into life.

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